Sunday, January 30, 2005
Behold, World
THIS IS WHAT REAL CIVIL RIGHTS LOOK LIKE.
Words fail me on such a day, so I'll just paraphrase our Novanglus, John Adams:
'The dons, the bashaws, the grandees, the patricians, the sachems, the nabobs, call them by what names you please, sigh and groan and fret, and sometimes stamp and foam and curse, but all in vain. The decree is gone forth, and it cannot be recalled, that a more equal liberty than has prevailed in other parts of the Arab world must be established in Iraq.'
Words have not failed Grim, however. Nor Steve H. Every word they said.
That breeze you feel is Freedom.
A Mighty Wind is blowing.
Words fail me on such a day, so I'll just paraphrase our Novanglus, John Adams:
'The dons, the bashaws, the grandees, the patricians, the sachems, the nabobs, call them by what names you please, sigh and groan and fret, and sometimes stamp and foam and curse, but all in vain. The decree is gone forth, and it cannot be recalled, that a more equal liberty than has prevailed in other parts of the Arab world must be established in Iraq.'
Words have not failed Grim, however. Nor Steve H. Every word they said.
That breeze you feel is Freedom.
A Mighty Wind is blowing.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Manufactured News Network's World-Wide Election Update!
OUR JOURNALISTIC GOAL: "ENFRANCHISING THE DISENFRENCHED!'
***(Atlanta, GA.) Just one hour after the polls opened in Iraq, Former President Jimmy Carter announced the winner: President Hugo Chavez and his Communist Party of Venezuela.
"Sure, I was for postponing these elections; after all, holding free & fair elections might bolster America's war effort and even help the President. I thought that asking those selfish, greedy Iraqis to wait for democracy was a small price to pay--especially considering all that Democrats have done for them," said Carter, speaking from the Carter Center for The-Rubber-Stamping-of-America's-Enemies'-Elections.
"But then, our exit-polling firm of Twist, Spinne & DeStort began showing a groundswell of support for Chavez in the suburbs of Mosul and Baghdad; I think they liked the way that Huey had pilfered his own country's oil wealth--Iraqis seem to like that in a leader. Anyway, I decided to go ahead and let the Iraqis vote. And they didn't disappoint us," beamed the former tennis-court scheduler, adding "We stand shoulder-to-shoulder with these brave voters--if, by 'shoulder-to-shoulder', you mean 'hiding in the safety of a hotel room in Amman, Jordan while they voted'."
Carter went on to say that he hoped now that Iraq had spoken, all future Iraqi elections could be cancelled and we could get back to the burning issues facing humanity, including examining George W. Bush's Air National Guard dental records from 1973, getting women into Augusta and coronating Kofi Annan 'President-for-Life-of-This-and-All-Other-Worlds-Both-Known-and-Unknown'.
***In American election news, it was recently revealed that six of the 9/11 hi-jackers were actually registered to vote. Democrats argued that the terrorists' uncast votes should be counted as Kerry/Gregoire votes.
"If only their flights hadn't been delayed, surely they would have supported the Democrats' highly-nuanced program of defeatism," said Democrat spokesman Phil A. Buster.
Surprisingly, Republican spokesman Opie N. Borders agreed, saying "These were hard-working terrorists who were only casting the ballots Americans didn't want to cast."
***And in what is widely seen as an attempt to secure Senate seats for both Dennis "Roswell" Kucinich and Al "Kal-El" Gore, Democrats today unveiled their newest campaign: "Statehood for Area 51!"
"Old hippies camped in VW vans out in the desert deserve representation, too," said DNC Chairmanaut Terry P. McQuatloo.
To sway voters, a series of broadcast commercials are planned, although those wearing tin-foil beanies would get to hear the messages first, as usual.
Should the ads fail to convince the electorate, the DNC plans to "bombard voters with powerful, yet environmentally-friendly mind-control rays from outer space," said McQuatloo. "When we 'get our message out', we lose--this will allow us to 'get our message in' instead."
***Facing the prospect of a tough re-election campaign, Sen. Blanche Lincoln (D., Arkansas) took issue with Andrew Sullivan's recent book-review of the new Lincoln biography, "How Gay Was Lincoln: 'You Only Shot Me Because I'm a Lesbian!'"
"I'm not gay," insisted Senator Lincoln; "Okay, okay; there was that sorority house-incident back in college-- but I'm not gay!"
Sullivan: "If completely heterosexual is a Kinsey zero and completely homosexual is a Kinsey six, [the author] puts Lincoln at five...I'd say you could make a case that Lincoln was, in fact, a four," wrote Sullivan, who is, in fact, a twelve.
In related Old News, historians are eagerly awaiting the release of another new Lincoln biography.
Written by an ambiguously-asexual ambidextrous Amish/Armenian-American author, the book is said prove conclusively that Lincoln was, "in fact", the nation's first ambiguously-asexual ambidextrous Amish/Armenian-American president.
***Sen. Arlen Specter (R., Innameonly), chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, complained bitterly that his Republican colleagues on the committee had taken to calling him "Senator Phil", after Phil Spector, the legendary music producer now accused of murder. This is apparently in retaliation for naming a partisan Democrat to head the committee's staff.
"It really hurts,'" said Specter. "They'll walk by and say things like "Wall of Separation, Wall of Sound--what's the difference?"...I think they're trying to get rid of me," speculated Specter/Spector.
Sources said many Republicans on the panel hoped to force a vote to replace Specter with boxing/self promoter Don King.
***And in European election news, the proposed European Constitution has been scrapped, either because voters could not understand it or because they understood it all too well.
Instead of the wordy and incomprehensible 500-page document, the EU now wants to ratify the lyrics to John Lennon's famous totalitarian dirge, "Imagine", as their new founding document.
"No God, no religion, no private property, no borders, no sovereignty, no escape--yes, 'Imagine' has it all," said EU Minister of Unaccountable Accounts, Facia LesBeaureucrat.
Tempers flared however, when it came time to decide who would record the new audio version of the "Imaginary" Constitution.
Germany insisted it be sung by David Hasselhoff, backed by the Vienna Palestinian Boy's Choir, while France insisted on Yoko Ono, with back-up vocals by a feral pack of rabid Costa Rican mantled howling monkeys. The Germans insisted that Ms. Ono's vocals would be indistinguishable from that of her background singers.
And people say Germans don't know music.
Tensions escalated, prompting Germany to move one of its two tanks to the French border. France retaliated by turning around its aircraft carrier at the dock, pointing it towards the sea. Or would have, if only French dock workers, maintainence technicians and the entire French Navy-man were not out on strike.
The impasse was resolved, however, when Sen. Arlen Specter of America offered to bury Yoko's vocal track behind lavish orchestration, layers of percussion and tons of echo.
***(Atlanta, GA.) Just one hour after the polls opened in Iraq, Former President Jimmy Carter announced the winner: President Hugo Chavez and his Communist Party of Venezuela.
"Sure, I was for postponing these elections; after all, holding free & fair elections might bolster America's war effort and even help the President. I thought that asking those selfish, greedy Iraqis to wait for democracy was a small price to pay--especially considering all that Democrats have done for them," said Carter, speaking from the Carter Center for The-Rubber-Stamping-of-America's-Enemies'-Elections.
"But then, our exit-polling firm of Twist, Spinne & DeStort began showing a groundswell of support for Chavez in the suburbs of Mosul and Baghdad; I think they liked the way that Huey had pilfered his own country's oil wealth--Iraqis seem to like that in a leader. Anyway, I decided to go ahead and let the Iraqis vote. And they didn't disappoint us," beamed the former tennis-court scheduler, adding "We stand shoulder-to-shoulder with these brave voters--if, by 'shoulder-to-shoulder', you mean 'hiding in the safety of a hotel room in Amman, Jordan while they voted'."
Carter went on to say that he hoped now that Iraq had spoken, all future Iraqi elections could be cancelled and we could get back to the burning issues facing humanity, including examining George W. Bush's Air National Guard dental records from 1973, getting women into Augusta and coronating Kofi Annan 'President-for-Life-of-This-and-All-Other-Worlds-Both-Known-and-Unknown'.
***In American election news, it was recently revealed that six of the 9/11 hi-jackers were actually registered to vote. Democrats argued that the terrorists' uncast votes should be counted as Kerry/Gregoire votes.
"If only their flights hadn't been delayed, surely they would have supported the Democrats' highly-nuanced program of defeatism," said Democrat spokesman Phil A. Buster.
Surprisingly, Republican spokesman Opie N. Borders agreed, saying "These were hard-working terrorists who were only casting the ballots Americans didn't want to cast."
***And in what is widely seen as an attempt to secure Senate seats for both Dennis "Roswell" Kucinich and Al "Kal-El" Gore, Democrats today unveiled their newest campaign: "Statehood for Area 51!"
"Old hippies camped in VW vans out in the desert deserve representation, too," said DNC Chairmanaut Terry P. McQuatloo.
To sway voters, a series of broadcast commercials are planned, although those wearing tin-foil beanies would get to hear the messages first, as usual.
Should the ads fail to convince the electorate, the DNC plans to "bombard voters with powerful, yet environmentally-friendly mind-control rays from outer space," said McQuatloo. "When we 'get our message out', we lose--this will allow us to 'get our message in' instead."
***Facing the prospect of a tough re-election campaign, Sen. Blanche Lincoln (D., Arkansas) took issue with Andrew Sullivan's recent book-review of the new Lincoln biography, "How Gay Was Lincoln: 'You Only Shot Me Because I'm a Lesbian!'"
"I'm not gay," insisted Senator Lincoln; "Okay, okay; there was that sorority house-incident back in college-- but I'm not gay!"
Sullivan: "If completely heterosexual is a Kinsey zero and completely homosexual is a Kinsey six, [the author] puts Lincoln at five...I'd say you could make a case that Lincoln was, in fact, a four," wrote Sullivan, who is, in fact, a twelve.
In related Old News, historians are eagerly awaiting the release of another new Lincoln biography.
Written by an ambiguously-asexual ambidextrous Amish/Armenian-American author, the book is said prove conclusively that Lincoln was, "in fact", the nation's first ambiguously-asexual ambidextrous Amish/Armenian-American president.
***Sen. Arlen Specter (R., Innameonly), chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee, complained bitterly that his Republican colleagues on the committee had taken to calling him "Senator Phil", after Phil Spector, the legendary music producer now accused of murder. This is apparently in retaliation for naming a partisan Democrat to head the committee's staff.
"It really hurts,'" said Specter. "They'll walk by and say things like "Wall of Separation, Wall of Sound--what's the difference?"...I think they're trying to get rid of me," speculated Specter/Spector.
Sources said many Republicans on the panel hoped to force a vote to replace Specter with boxing/self promoter Don King.
***And in European election news, the proposed European Constitution has been scrapped, either because voters could not understand it or because they understood it all too well.
Instead of the wordy and incomprehensible 500-page document, the EU now wants to ratify the lyrics to John Lennon's famous totalitarian dirge, "Imagine", as their new founding document.
"No God, no religion, no private property, no borders, no sovereignty, no escape--yes, 'Imagine' has it all," said EU Minister of Unaccountable Accounts, Facia LesBeaureucrat.
Tempers flared however, when it came time to decide who would record the new audio version of the "Imaginary" Constitution.
Germany insisted it be sung by David Hasselhoff, backed by the Vienna Palestinian Boy's Choir, while France insisted on Yoko Ono, with back-up vocals by a feral pack of rabid Costa Rican mantled howling monkeys. The Germans insisted that Ms. Ono's vocals would be indistinguishable from that of her background singers.
And people say Germans don't know music.
Tensions escalated, prompting Germany to move one of its two tanks to the French border. France retaliated by turning around its aircraft carrier at the dock, pointing it towards the sea. Or would have, if only French dock workers, maintainence technicians and the entire French Navy-man were not out on strike.
The impasse was resolved, however, when Sen. Arlen Specter of America offered to bury Yoko's vocal track behind lavish orchestration, layers of percussion and tons of echo.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
The Never-Ending Story
The Pomp.
The Circumstance.
The evening gowns, costing more than the budgets of some small countries. Tables full of millionaires rubbing elbows, clinking champagne glasses while discussing their naked political agendas. The limousines and perks of power. And all this during wartime.
The critics are right. It's all too much;
...let's cancel the Academy Awards.
But let's celebrate the inauguration of our President!
And especially during wartime.
Some of those who sought to diminish this inauguration day simply do not believe this country is worth celebrating anytime--and the rest seek to diminish this President at any opportunity. (Much like the opposition to the war in Iraq; half of it would simply disappear overnight if only George W. Bush had a "D." after his name instead of an "R.").
Ronald Reagan captured the spirit of such a day well when he was inaugurated as governor in 1967:
"To a number of us, this is a first and hence a solemn and momentous occasion, and yet, on the broad page of state and national history, what is taking place here is almost commonplace routine. We are participating in the orderly transfer of administrative authority by direction of the people. And this is the simple magic which makes a commonplace routine a near miracle to many of the world's inhabitants: the continuing fact that the people, by democratic process, can delegate this power, yet retain custody of it."
"Perhaps you and I have lived with this miracle too long to be properly appreciative. Freedom is a fragile thing and is never more than one generation away from extinction, It is not ours by inheritance; it must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for it comes only once to a people. Those who have known freedom and then lost it have never known it again. Knowing this, it is hard to explain those who even today would question the people's capacity for self-rule. Will they answer this: if no one among us is capable of governing himself, then who among us has the capacity to govern someone else?"
Congratulations to President Bush, who weathered the storm, emerging victorious in an election that saw attacks on campaign headquarters, the most vile and baseless kind of political charges, a journalistic coup attempt by CBS and ceaseless propagandizing by the other "Mainstream" "news" organizations--and even the outright theft of at least one state's (Wisconsin's) electoral votes by organized Democratvotefraud. (Yes, it's one word.)
President Bush:
"America's vital interests and our deepest beliefs are now one. From the day of our Founding, we have proclaimed that every man and woman on this earth has rights, and dignity, and matchless value, because they bear the image of the Maker of Heaven and earth. Across the generations we have proclaimed the imperative of self-government, because no one is fit to be a master, and no one deserves to be a slave. Advancing these ideals is the mission that created our Nation. It is the honorable achievement of our fathers. Now it is the urgent requirement of our nation's security, and the calling of our time."
Just so, Mr. President.
But above all, congratulations go to the American people. For even though the battle for our freedoms never ends, even though our liberty is under assault both at home and abroad and must always be defended, it can still be said today as when Alexander Hamilton first spoke it:
"Here, sir, the people rule."
And we always will, providing we never--EVER--take it for granted.
Now...Party!
The Circumstance.
The evening gowns, costing more than the budgets of some small countries. Tables full of millionaires rubbing elbows, clinking champagne glasses while discussing their naked political agendas. The limousines and perks of power. And all this during wartime.
The critics are right. It's all too much;
...let's cancel the Academy Awards.
But let's celebrate the inauguration of our President!
And especially during wartime.
Some of those who sought to diminish this inauguration day simply do not believe this country is worth celebrating anytime--and the rest seek to diminish this President at any opportunity. (Much like the opposition to the war in Iraq; half of it would simply disappear overnight if only George W. Bush had a "D." after his name instead of an "R.").
Ronald Reagan captured the spirit of such a day well when he was inaugurated as governor in 1967:
"To a number of us, this is a first and hence a solemn and momentous occasion, and yet, on the broad page of state and national history, what is taking place here is almost commonplace routine. We are participating in the orderly transfer of administrative authority by direction of the people. And this is the simple magic which makes a commonplace routine a near miracle to many of the world's inhabitants: the continuing fact that the people, by democratic process, can delegate this power, yet retain custody of it."
"Perhaps you and I have lived with this miracle too long to be properly appreciative. Freedom is a fragile thing and is never more than one generation away from extinction, It is not ours by inheritance; it must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for it comes only once to a people. Those who have known freedom and then lost it have never known it again. Knowing this, it is hard to explain those who even today would question the people's capacity for self-rule. Will they answer this: if no one among us is capable of governing himself, then who among us has the capacity to govern someone else?"
Congratulations to President Bush, who weathered the storm, emerging victorious in an election that saw attacks on campaign headquarters, the most vile and baseless kind of political charges, a journalistic coup attempt by CBS and ceaseless propagandizing by the other "Mainstream" "news" organizations--and even the outright theft of at least one state's (Wisconsin's) electoral votes by organized Democratvotefraud. (Yes, it's one word.)
President Bush:
"America's vital interests and our deepest beliefs are now one. From the day of our Founding, we have proclaimed that every man and woman on this earth has rights, and dignity, and matchless value, because they bear the image of the Maker of Heaven and earth. Across the generations we have proclaimed the imperative of self-government, because no one is fit to be a master, and no one deserves to be a slave. Advancing these ideals is the mission that created our Nation. It is the honorable achievement of our fathers. Now it is the urgent requirement of our nation's security, and the calling of our time."
Just so, Mr. President.
But above all, congratulations go to the American people. For even though the battle for our freedoms never ends, even though our liberty is under assault both at home and abroad and must always be defended, it can still be said today as when Alexander Hamilton first spoke it:
"Here, sir, the people rule."
And we always will, providing we never--EVER--take it for granted.
Now...Party!
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
MNN's "60 Seconds"
TONIGHT...IS CBS A.W.O.L. (Arrogant With-Out Let-up)?
CBSNews announced today that Dan Rather's replacement would be none other than the elusive Lucy Ramirez.
CBS spokes-babe Libby Ruhl-Baez said "We were considering several other fictional candidates for the job, such as Harvey the Giant Invisible Pink Rabbit, Paul Bunyan and the Tooth Fairy, but when the unimpeachable Bill Burkett vouched for her, well, that was all we needed."
Doctors said that unless Burkett's rare tropical fever broke, Ramirez would report for duty at the network this spring. However, they reported little progress in the search for a cure for overweenus arrogantitis journalismus, commonly known as 'Dan Rather's Ego'.
CBSNews announced today that Dan Rather's replacement would be none other than the elusive Lucy Ramirez.
CBS spokes-babe Libby Ruhl-Baez said "We were considering several other fictional candidates for the job, such as Harvey the Giant Invisible Pink Rabbit, Paul Bunyan and the Tooth Fairy, but when the unimpeachable Bill Burkett vouched for her, well, that was all we needed."
Doctors said that unless Burkett's rare tropical fever broke, Ramirez would report for duty at the network this spring. However, they reported little progress in the search for a cure for overweenus arrogantitis journalismus, commonly known as 'Dan Rather's Ego'.
Sunday, January 16, 2005
Why Democrats are Losing
THEY DESERVE TO.
Democrats have somehow managed to become a third-rate party in a two-party system.
It seems to baffle them. Not me.
I was a Democrat all my life--until the debacle in Mogadishu. That was the last straw...and Reason #1 why I left my party. But it was only the first of thousands of reasons to follow.
Lemme' tell you a little story:
The other day, I'm watching the Gonzales Confirmation Hearings/Show Trial.
Sen. Russ "Way Too Much Free Speech Goin' On 'Round Heah" Feingold disputed the fact that civil libertarians & the American Library Association had responded hysterically to the Patriot Act.
Well, my library did.
A while back, I went to my library. I wanted to finish reading a book that I'd checked out some months earlier, so I asked the for name of the book. I was informed that the library had destroyed those records in order to protect me from the eveeeil John Ashcroft.
The leftist ALA has taken the position that terrorists have iron-clad right to use library facilities in the futherance of their illegal war. And that libraries have an affirmative duty to obstruct justice should lawful authorities seek to investigate.
Sorry, Russ; that IS extremist hysteria. And Reason # 10,593 why I will never vote for someone with a "D." after their name.
Hell, at this point, I wouldn't even vote for a dentist with a "D. D.S." after his name.
This is not just academic. Terrorists have indeed used library computers to swap anthrax recipies and send e-mails to Osama.cave.
Anyway, after I thanked the librarian for protecting me from the criminal Ashcroft, I foolishly asked if my 7-yr. old had returned "Make Way for Ducklings" yet. I was promptly informed that this was privileged information.
My jaw hit the floor.
As far as the library was concerned, vis a vis my child... I was now the eveeeil John Ashcroft!
I can't be trusted not to squelch the child's intellectual curiosity, you see; after all, I'm just the parent. And a member the oppressive patriarchary! Reason #10,594--check.
By the way, here's a little quiz:
Can you name the only American whose borrowing records were seized in a blatant political witch-hunt? tick...tick...tick...
Yes, that's right! That American was...Clarence Thomas!
His video rental records were seized by Democrats hoping to prove that he had rented porn. Because, you know, Democrats are really against porn. And hypocrisy. (Reasons#10,595-97.)
Donks seem to think that a couple of head-fakes to the right will restore them to power. Their new motto: "Democrats...We Tolerate America!"
Yeah. That's the ticket.
Let me help you out here, Donks.
May I suggest instead that when, for example, Michael Moore says that the terrorists in Iraq are the new "Minute Men" (#10,598), you not reward him with a seat in the Presidential box at your convention (#10,599). You see, out here in Jesusland, we regard the 101st Airborne--not terrorists--as the true "Minute Men".
Just stop it. Stop driving wedges into families. Stop coddling terrorists. Stop rooting for the other side. Stop opposing the President at every turn, just for the sake of opposition (#10,600).
Or, you could just do what I and millions of others have done;
Stop being a Democrat.
And put your country first for a change.
Democrats have somehow managed to become a third-rate party in a two-party system.
It seems to baffle them. Not me.
I was a Democrat all my life--until the debacle in Mogadishu. That was the last straw...and Reason #1 why I left my party. But it was only the first of thousands of reasons to follow.
Lemme' tell you a little story:
The other day, I'm watching the Gonzales Confirmation Hearings/Show Trial.
Sen. Russ "Way Too Much Free Speech Goin' On 'Round Heah" Feingold disputed the fact that civil libertarians & the American Library Association had responded hysterically to the Patriot Act.
Well, my library did.
A while back, I went to my library. I wanted to finish reading a book that I'd checked out some months earlier, so I asked the for name of the book. I was informed that the library had destroyed those records in order to protect me from the eveeeil John Ashcroft.
The leftist ALA has taken the position that terrorists have iron-clad right to use library facilities in the futherance of their illegal war. And that libraries have an affirmative duty to obstruct justice should lawful authorities seek to investigate.
Sorry, Russ; that IS extremist hysteria. And Reason # 10,593 why I will never vote for someone with a "D." after their name.
Hell, at this point, I wouldn't even vote for a dentist with a "D. D.S." after his name.
This is not just academic. Terrorists have indeed used library computers to swap anthrax recipies and send e-mails to Osama.cave.
Anyway, after I thanked the librarian for protecting me from the criminal Ashcroft, I foolishly asked if my 7-yr. old had returned "Make Way for Ducklings" yet. I was promptly informed that this was privileged information.
My jaw hit the floor.
As far as the library was concerned, vis a vis my child... I was now the eveeeil John Ashcroft!
I can't be trusted not to squelch the child's intellectual curiosity, you see; after all, I'm just the parent. And a member the oppressive patriarchary! Reason #10,594--check.
By the way, here's a little quiz:
Can you name the only American whose borrowing records were seized in a blatant political witch-hunt? tick...tick...tick...
Yes, that's right! That American was...Clarence Thomas!
His video rental records were seized by Democrats hoping to prove that he had rented porn. Because, you know, Democrats are really against porn. And hypocrisy. (Reasons#10,595-97.)
Donks seem to think that a couple of head-fakes to the right will restore them to power. Their new motto: "Democrats...We Tolerate America!"
Yeah. That's the ticket.
Let me help you out here, Donks.
May I suggest instead that when, for example, Michael Moore says that the terrorists in Iraq are the new "Minute Men" (#10,598), you not reward him with a seat in the Presidential box at your convention (#10,599). You see, out here in Jesusland, we regard the 101st Airborne--not terrorists--as the true "Minute Men".
Just stop it. Stop driving wedges into families. Stop coddling terrorists. Stop rooting for the other side. Stop opposing the President at every turn, just for the sake of opposition (#10,600).
Or, you could just do what I and millions of others have done;
Stop being a Democrat.
And put your country first for a change.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Manufactured News Update
"MNN: BUILDING THE NEWS TO YOUR SPECIFICATIONS SINCE 2002!"
(Toulouse-Repeatedly, France) France has issued an objection to Prince Harry's recent appearance at a party in Nazi uniform.
"Under EU regulations and by long-standing tradition, all those wearing German military uniforms in public shall be attended by a cadre of unionized French valets," said France's Minister of Appeasement, Singe de Reddition.
The Beeb has also weighed in. In an editorial from Joseph P. Gerbils of the BBC's Office of Barely-Disguised Judenhass: "Nazi uniforms...say; why didn't we think of that?"
Buckingham Palace claimed that Prince Harry was, in fact, just practicing "performance art".
"Prince Harry didn't mean anything by it. It's just that he's always wanted to be a performance artist," said royal spokesman Roy "Al" Spachsmunn.
"But he's apologized--and Harry's only wish now is to be referred to as 'the prince formerly known as artist'."
(Toulouse-Repeatedly, France) France has issued an objection to Prince Harry's recent appearance at a party in Nazi uniform.
"Under EU regulations and by long-standing tradition, all those wearing German military uniforms in public shall be attended by a cadre of unionized French valets," said France's Minister of Appeasement, Singe de Reddition.
The Beeb has also weighed in. In an editorial from Joseph P. Gerbils of the BBC's Office of Barely-Disguised Judenhass: "Nazi uniforms...say; why didn't we think of that?"
Buckingham Palace claimed that Prince Harry was, in fact, just practicing "performance art".
"Prince Harry didn't mean anything by it. It's just that he's always wanted to be a performance artist," said royal spokesman Roy "Al" Spachsmunn.
"But he's apologized--and Harry's only wish now is to be referred to as 'the prince formerly known as artist'."
Sunday, January 09, 2005
The Battle of New Orleans, 190 Years On
(From our archives, Oct. 23, 2002:)
OUR NAMESAKE
"I will smash them, so help me God!"
For those who would like to know more about the original Sharp Knife, Andrew Jackson, but just can't find the time between work, school, family and invading small countries, we offer Robert V. Remini's "The Battle of New Orleans" (1999, Viking).
(His fellow warriors, the American Indians, gave Jackson the name "Sharp Knife", along with the name "Pointed Arrow". And probably "Bastard" as well.)
Professor Remini wrote a classic 3-volume work on Jackson, but this small 200-page work captures the essential Jackson at the height of his power.
You'll learn how Old Hickory brought together a force that would make today's multi-culturalists drool, if only they subscribed to American greatness: Free Blacks, American Indians, Kentucky Hillbillies, Pirates, Tennessee Militiamen and Creoles, in a war that involved Britain, Canada, The Indian Nations, Russia, France, Spain...and the questionable fate of a still-shaky American nation.
Britain never really conceded its loss during the Revolution, and decided to try once more. After burning the White House and the Capitol, they saw the re-colonization--or at least, dominance--of America within their grasp. All they needed was control of the Mississippi River.
And then Andy Jackson happened to them.
And they never came back.
This is no dry history. This war was the forge of our Star-Spangled Banner, and how our country was made.
And this was the Last Battle of the Revolution (a view disputed by Churchill), won by a man who started fighting the Redcoats while still a 13 year-old boy!
In his own words:
"Who are we? Are we the titled slaves of George III? The military conscripts of Napoleon the Great? Or the frozen peasants of the Russian Czar? No! We are the free-born Sons of America...the only people on Earth who possess rights, liberties & property which they dare to call their own!"
If you are not acquainted with the greatest warrior this nation ever produced, the loss is yours...
and perhaps his.
OUR NAMESAKE
"I will smash them, so help me God!"
For those who would like to know more about the original Sharp Knife, Andrew Jackson, but just can't find the time between work, school, family and invading small countries, we offer Robert V. Remini's "The Battle of New Orleans" (1999, Viking).
(His fellow warriors, the American Indians, gave Jackson the name "Sharp Knife", along with the name "Pointed Arrow". And probably "Bastard" as well.)
Professor Remini wrote a classic 3-volume work on Jackson, but this small 200-page work captures the essential Jackson at the height of his power.
You'll learn how Old Hickory brought together a force that would make today's multi-culturalists drool, if only they subscribed to American greatness: Free Blacks, American Indians, Kentucky Hillbillies, Pirates, Tennessee Militiamen and Creoles, in a war that involved Britain, Canada, The Indian Nations, Russia, France, Spain...and the questionable fate of a still-shaky American nation.
Britain never really conceded its loss during the Revolution, and decided to try once more. After burning the White House and the Capitol, they saw the re-colonization--or at least, dominance--of America within their grasp. All they needed was control of the Mississippi River.
And then Andy Jackson happened to them.
And they never came back.
This is no dry history. This war was the forge of our Star-Spangled Banner, and how our country was made.
And this was the Last Battle of the Revolution (a view disputed by Churchill), won by a man who started fighting the Redcoats while still a 13 year-old boy!
In his own words:
"Who are we? Are we the titled slaves of George III? The military conscripts of Napoleon the Great? Or the frozen peasants of the Russian Czar? No! We are the free-born Sons of America...the only people on Earth who possess rights, liberties & property which they dare to call their own!"
If you are not acquainted with the greatest warrior this nation ever produced, the loss is yours...
and perhaps his.
Manufactured News Network presents...
"LIFTLINE!"
Our LIFTLINE correspondent Nuy Diehl sits down on the ski-lift with Sen. Harry Reid of Nevada:
(Vail, CO.) After accusing Pres. Bush of planning to 'dismantle' Social Security, Sen. Harry Reid today unveiled his own Social Security reform plan.
"If we stopped routing everyone's money through Washington, D.C., why, just think of the trauma that would cause to our senior citizens. Senior citizens like Robert Byrd & John Dingell, I mean. No, I 've got a much better plan," said Reid. "I call it my "Personal-Ponzi-as-you-Go" Plan."
"As everyone knows, Social Security originally had 43 workers for each retiree. We now have 2.5 workers for each retiree. I propose that we wait and do nothing until there is just one tax-paying worker per retired senior. The government would then introduce them to each other...and assign that worker to a specific senior--after, of course, taking a nominal introduction fee of, say, 50% out of every paycheck. Sort of like a dating service...Okay, okay, an escort service," pimped Reid.
"The senior citizen and his personal tax-payer would then split the remaining 50% of the worker's paycheck--and what could possibly be more fair than that?"
"Just think how this would bring us together as a nation. When Mr. Bob Toofless of Methane Meadows, Iowa gets up at 3 a.m. on a freezing, February morning to slop the hogs, he'll have the distinct pleasure of knowing that he's working, not just for himself and his family, but for Mrs. Stephanie Hoskins of Coral Gables, Fla., who, all alone in her beachfront condo, desperately needs a sharp, new pair of scissors with which to clip coupons. And a trip to the beauty parlor. And $10,000 to take advantage of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity from the Nigerian government."
"And speaking of government opportunities, Mr. Toofless will have the deep, deep satisfaction of knowing that his government only charged him half his income for the pleasure. Lemme' tell ya' what...you won't find bargains like that in these 'private-sector accounts'," said Reid, unaccountably.
"And think of the increases in productivity; the retiree could actually go over to his worker's house each morning and make sure his tax-payer got out of bed on time. Or give his worker a ride to the bank on paydays. And should his tax-payer call in sick, the senior could call his personal employee on the phone, and browbeat him into going in to work: "Get out of bed, you lazy slacker; Fridays are my poker nights, and you're not going to mess that up!""
"Yes, my plan would bring us together, increase productivity and would be, above all, fair...fair to appropriators in Washington, D.C.. And, when you think about it, that's what's really important, isn't it?" asked Rheid, rhetorically.
When asked why government employees would be exempt under his plan, Reid explained "As government employees, we don't want to horn in on this good thing and hog it all to ourselves. And, frankly, this plan is just too good for us. We don't deserve it. But you do."
"Besides, how would you like your retirement based on Ted Kennedy showing up to work sober and on time?" added Reid, speaking from his ski lodge in Vail, Colo., on his extended, federally-paid vacation in honor of National Asparagus Month.
Our LIFTLINE correspondent Nuy Diehl sits down on the ski-lift with Sen. Harry Reid of Nevada:
(Vail, CO.) After accusing Pres. Bush of planning to 'dismantle' Social Security, Sen. Harry Reid today unveiled his own Social Security reform plan.
"If we stopped routing everyone's money through Washington, D.C., why, just think of the trauma that would cause to our senior citizens. Senior citizens like Robert Byrd & John Dingell, I mean. No, I 've got a much better plan," said Reid. "I call it my "Personal-Ponzi-as-you-Go" Plan."
"As everyone knows, Social Security originally had 43 workers for each retiree. We now have 2.5 workers for each retiree. I propose that we wait and do nothing until there is just one tax-paying worker per retired senior. The government would then introduce them to each other...and assign that worker to a specific senior--after, of course, taking a nominal introduction fee of, say, 50% out of every paycheck. Sort of like a dating service...Okay, okay, an escort service," pimped Reid.
"The senior citizen and his personal tax-payer would then split the remaining 50% of the worker's paycheck--and what could possibly be more fair than that?"
"Just think how this would bring us together as a nation. When Mr. Bob Toofless of Methane Meadows, Iowa gets up at 3 a.m. on a freezing, February morning to slop the hogs, he'll have the distinct pleasure of knowing that he's working, not just for himself and his family, but for Mrs. Stephanie Hoskins of Coral Gables, Fla., who, all alone in her beachfront condo, desperately needs a sharp, new pair of scissors with which to clip coupons. And a trip to the beauty parlor. And $10,000 to take advantage of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity from the Nigerian government."
"And speaking of government opportunities, Mr. Toofless will have the deep, deep satisfaction of knowing that his government only charged him half his income for the pleasure. Lemme' tell ya' what...you won't find bargains like that in these 'private-sector accounts'," said Reid, unaccountably.
"And think of the increases in productivity; the retiree could actually go over to his worker's house each morning and make sure his tax-payer got out of bed on time. Or give his worker a ride to the bank on paydays. And should his tax-payer call in sick, the senior could call his personal employee on the phone, and browbeat him into going in to work: "Get out of bed, you lazy slacker; Fridays are my poker nights, and you're not going to mess that up!""
"Yes, my plan would bring us together, increase productivity and would be, above all, fair...fair to appropriators in Washington, D.C.. And, when you think about it, that's what's really important, isn't it?" asked Rheid, rhetorically.
When asked why government employees would be exempt under his plan, Reid explained "As government employees, we don't want to horn in on this good thing and hog it all to ourselves. And, frankly, this plan is just too good for us. We don't deserve it. But you do."
"Besides, how would you like your retirement based on Ted Kennedy showing up to work sober and on time?" added Reid, speaking from his ski lodge in Vail, Colo., on his extended, federally-paid vacation in honor of National Asparagus Month.
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
The Anti-Abolitionist
& THE ORIGINAL 'NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND':
"...It is not a theory they put into his mind, but an assumption, which ten years hence, its origin forgotten and its presence unconscious, will condition him to take one side in a controversy which he has never recognized as a controversy at all. The authors themselves, I suspect, hardly know what they are doing to the boy, and he cannot know what is being done to him.
...From this passage the schoolboy will learn about literature precisely nothing. What he will learn quickly enough, and perhaps indelibly, is the belief that all emotions aroused by local association are in themselves contrary to reason and contemptible. He will have no notion that there are two ways of being immune to such an advertisement—that it falls equally flat on those who are above it and those who are below it, on the man of real sensibility and on the mere trousered ape who has never been able to conceive the Atlantic as anything more than so many million tons of cold salt water. There are two men to whom we offer in vain a false leading article on patriotism and honour: one is the coward, the other is the honourable and patriotic man. None of this is brought before the schoolboy's mind. On the contrary, he is encouraged to reject the lure of the 'Western Ocean' on the very dangerous ground that in so doing he will prove himself a knowing fellow who can't be bubbled out of his cash. Gaius and Titius, while teaching him nothing about letters, have cut out of his soul, long before he is old enough to choose, the possibility of having certain experiences which thinkers of more authority than they have held to be generous, fruitful, and humane.
...That is their day's lesson in English, though of English they have learned nothing. Another little portion of the human heritage has been quietly taken from them before they were old enough to understand.
...For every one pupil who needs to be guarded from a weak excess of sensibility there are three who need to be awakened from the slumber of cold vulgarity. The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but to irrigate deserts. The right defence against false sentiments is to inculcate just sentiments. By starving the sensibility of our pupils we only make them easier prey to the propagandist when he comes. For famished nature will be avenged and a hard heart is no infallible protection against a soft head.
...Until quite modern times all teachers and even all men believed the universe to be such that certain emotional reactions on our part could be either congruous or incongruous to it—believed, in fact, that objects did not merely receive, but could merit, our approval or disapproval, our reverence or our contempt.
...It is the doctrine of objective value, the belief that certain attitudes are really true, and others really false, to the kind of thing the universe is and the kind of things we are.
...Where the old initiated, the new merely 'conditions'. The old dealt with its pupils as grown birds deal with young birds when they teach them to fly; the new deals with them more as the poultry-keeper deals with young birds— making them thus or thus for purposes of which the birds know nothing. In a word, the old was a kind of propagation—men transmitting manhood to men; the new is merely propaganda.
...The operation of The Green Book and its kind is to produce what may be called Men without Chests. It is an outrage that they should be commonly spoken of as Intellectuals. This gives them the chance to say that he who attacks them attacks Intelligence. It is not so. They are not distinguished from other men by any unusual skill in finding truth nor any virginal ardour to pursue her. Indeed it would be strange if they were: a persevering devotion to truth, a nice sense of intellectual honour, cannot be long maintained without the aid of a sentiment which Gaius and Titius could debunk as easily as any other. It is not excess of thought but defect of fertile and generous emotion that marks them out. Their heads are no bigger than the ordinary: it is the atrophy of the chest beneath that makes them seem so.
And all the time—such is the tragi-comedy of our situation—we continue to clamour for those very qualities we are rendering impossible. You can hardly open a periodical without coming across the statement that what our civilization needs is more 'drive', or dynamism, or self-sacrifice, or 'creativity'. In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function. We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honour and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. We castrate and bid the geldings be fruitful."--C. S. Lewis, The Abolition of Man
"...It is not a theory they put into his mind, but an assumption, which ten years hence, its origin forgotten and its presence unconscious, will condition him to take one side in a controversy which he has never recognized as a controversy at all. The authors themselves, I suspect, hardly know what they are doing to the boy, and he cannot know what is being done to him.
...From this passage the schoolboy will learn about literature precisely nothing. What he will learn quickly enough, and perhaps indelibly, is the belief that all emotions aroused by local association are in themselves contrary to reason and contemptible. He will have no notion that there are two ways of being immune to such an advertisement—that it falls equally flat on those who are above it and those who are below it, on the man of real sensibility and on the mere trousered ape who has never been able to conceive the Atlantic as anything more than so many million tons of cold salt water. There are two men to whom we offer in vain a false leading article on patriotism and honour: one is the coward, the other is the honourable and patriotic man. None of this is brought before the schoolboy's mind. On the contrary, he is encouraged to reject the lure of the 'Western Ocean' on the very dangerous ground that in so doing he will prove himself a knowing fellow who can't be bubbled out of his cash. Gaius and Titius, while teaching him nothing about letters, have cut out of his soul, long before he is old enough to choose, the possibility of having certain experiences which thinkers of more authority than they have held to be generous, fruitful, and humane.
...That is their day's lesson in English, though of English they have learned nothing. Another little portion of the human heritage has been quietly taken from them before they were old enough to understand.
...For every one pupil who needs to be guarded from a weak excess of sensibility there are three who need to be awakened from the slumber of cold vulgarity. The task of the modern educator is not to cut down jungles but to irrigate deserts. The right defence against false sentiments is to inculcate just sentiments. By starving the sensibility of our pupils we only make them easier prey to the propagandist when he comes. For famished nature will be avenged and a hard heart is no infallible protection against a soft head.
...Until quite modern times all teachers and even all men believed the universe to be such that certain emotional reactions on our part could be either congruous or incongruous to it—believed, in fact, that objects did not merely receive, but could merit, our approval or disapproval, our reverence or our contempt.
...It is the doctrine of objective value, the belief that certain attitudes are really true, and others really false, to the kind of thing the universe is and the kind of things we are.
...Where the old initiated, the new merely 'conditions'. The old dealt with its pupils as grown birds deal with young birds when they teach them to fly; the new deals with them more as the poultry-keeper deals with young birds— making them thus or thus for purposes of which the birds know nothing. In a word, the old was a kind of propagation—men transmitting manhood to men; the new is merely propaganda.
...The operation of The Green Book and its kind is to produce what may be called Men without Chests. It is an outrage that they should be commonly spoken of as Intellectuals. This gives them the chance to say that he who attacks them attacks Intelligence. It is not so. They are not distinguished from other men by any unusual skill in finding truth nor any virginal ardour to pursue her. Indeed it would be strange if they were: a persevering devotion to truth, a nice sense of intellectual honour, cannot be long maintained without the aid of a sentiment which Gaius and Titius could debunk as easily as any other. It is not excess of thought but defect of fertile and generous emotion that marks them out. Their heads are no bigger than the ordinary: it is the atrophy of the chest beneath that makes them seem so.
And all the time—such is the tragi-comedy of our situation—we continue to clamour for those very qualities we are rendering impossible. You can hardly open a periodical without coming across the statement that what our civilization needs is more 'drive', or dynamism, or self-sacrifice, or 'creativity'. In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand the function. We make men without chests and expect of them virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honour and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. We castrate and bid the geldings be fruitful."--C. S. Lewis, The Abolition of Man
With Power Comes Responsibility
EXCEPT AT THE U.N.
John O'Sullivan:
"What we have in the U.N. system is a body that is not accountable democratically, in charge of significant resources, convinced of its own worthiness, and avid for more power. Corruption and maladministration were bound to be the results...Until the U.N. itself is properly reformed and brought under democratic control, it should be given not more powers but fewer."
Leave aside the fact that the West pays most of Jan Egeland's comfortable UN salary; when he asserted that the West was 'stingy', it was just a case of the mask slipping for a brief, shining moment under duress.
Egeland asserted that Western voters are clamoring to pay more taxes, but just can't find any politicians who are willing to raise them. If only.
Socialists such as Mr. Egelund see taxes as charity when in fact, taxes are usually the opposite of charity. Their preferred system would be for everyone to simply turn over their paychecks to the government--preferably, a UN government--to be distributed by disinterested bureaucrats, who, after all, know best. Right.
But is America stingy? No. I'm sorry...Hell, no!
I don't think you can even compute the amount that Americans contribute. We patrol the world's shipping lanes. We protect dozens of countries. We underwrite the world's economy. We invent new drugs and technologies. We volunteer. We educate. We've liberated millions and millions in the last hundred years--what's that worth, Mr. Egeland?
For example, because Americans pay full retail price, our drug companies are able to give away drugs to struggling, backwards countries such as Uganda & Canada. And now Sri Lanka.
Our government gives. Our businesses give. Our churches. Our neighbors. Our children even empty their piggy-banks. Why? Because it's right. How? Because we're still free--despite the UN.
If you want me to take the UN seriously, Eggy, you could start by repaying the money stolen from Iraqi children under the Oil-for-Ski-Vacations program.
And pay your parking tickets while your at it.
UPDATE: Steyn says this is Norway to run a relief operation.
John O'Sullivan:
"What we have in the U.N. system is a body that is not accountable democratically, in charge of significant resources, convinced of its own worthiness, and avid for more power. Corruption and maladministration were bound to be the results...Until the U.N. itself is properly reformed and brought under democratic control, it should be given not more powers but fewer."
Leave aside the fact that the West pays most of Jan Egeland's comfortable UN salary; when he asserted that the West was 'stingy', it was just a case of the mask slipping for a brief, shining moment under duress.
Egeland asserted that Western voters are clamoring to pay more taxes, but just can't find any politicians who are willing to raise them. If only.
Socialists such as Mr. Egelund see taxes as charity when in fact, taxes are usually the opposite of charity. Their preferred system would be for everyone to simply turn over their paychecks to the government--preferably, a UN government--to be distributed by disinterested bureaucrats, who, after all, know best. Right.
But is America stingy? No. I'm sorry...Hell, no!
I don't think you can even compute the amount that Americans contribute. We patrol the world's shipping lanes. We protect dozens of countries. We underwrite the world's economy. We invent new drugs and technologies. We volunteer. We educate. We've liberated millions and millions in the last hundred years--what's that worth, Mr. Egeland?
For example, because Americans pay full retail price, our drug companies are able to give away drugs to struggling, backwards countries such as Uganda & Canada. And now Sri Lanka.
Our government gives. Our businesses give. Our churches. Our neighbors. Our children even empty their piggy-banks. Why? Because it's right. How? Because we're still free--despite the UN.
If you want me to take the UN seriously, Eggy, you could start by repaying the money stolen from Iraqi children under the Oil-for-Ski-Vacations program.
And pay your parking tickets while your at it.
UPDATE: Steyn says this is Norway to run a relief operation.
Saturday, January 01, 2005
The President Speaks
President George W. Bush Addresses the Nation on Iraq and Terrorism:
[ Broadcast from the White House at 10:30 p.m. ]
"My fellow Americans:
I want to talk to you plainly tonight about what we are doing in Iraq and about our policy in the Middle East.
In the simplest terms, what we are doing in Iraq is this: We are trying to prevent a third world war.
I think most people in this country recognized that fact last year. And they warmly supported the decision of the Government to help the nation of Iraq against the Ba'athist dictator. Now, many persons, even some who applauded our decision to liberate Iraq, have forgotten the basic reason for our action.
It is right for us to be in Iraq now. It was right last year. It is right today.
I want to remind you why this is true.
The terrorists in the region are engaged in a monstrous conspiracy to stamp out freedom all over the world. If they were to succeed, the United States would be numbered among their principal victims. It must be clear to everyone that the United States cannot--and will not--sit idly by and await another attack. The only question is: What is the best time to meet the threat and how is the best way to meet it?
The best time to meet the threat is in the beginning. It is easier to put out a fire in the beginning when it is small than after it has become a roaring blaze. And the best way to meet the threat of aggression is for the peace-loving nations to act together. If they don't act together, they are likely to be picked off, one by one.
If we had followed the right policies in the 1990's--if the free countries had acted together to crush the aggression of the terrorists, and if we had acted in the beginning when the aggression was small--there probably would have been no Sept.11.
If history has taught us anything, it is that aggression anywhere in the world is a threat to the peace everywhere in the world. When that aggression is supported by the cruel and selfish rulers of powerful nations who are bent on conquest, it becomes a clear and present danger to the security and independence of every free nation.
The American people are unified in their belief in democratic freedom. We are united in detesting terrorist slavery.
We know that the cost of freedom is high. But we are determined to preserve our freedom--no matter what the cost.
I know that our people are willing to do their part to support our soldiers and sailors and airmen who are fighting in Iraq. I know that our fighting men can count on each and every one of you.
Our country stands before the world as an example of how free men, under God, can build a community of neighbors, working together for the good of all.
That is the goal we seek not only for ourselves, but for all people. We believe that freedom and peace are essential if men are to live as our Creator intended us to live. It is this faith that has guided us in the past, and it is this faith that will fortify us in the stern days ahead."
...Wait a minute; did I say that was George W. Bush speaking on Iraq & the terrorists?
Oops, my bad; that was Harry S. Truman speaking on Korea & the Communists, here and here.
Sadly, today's Liberals wouldn't know the Truman Doctrine from Truman Capote.
And the so-called "Progressive" Left has become their once-favorite epithet:
...Reactionary!
(re·ac·tion·ar·y, adj.: Characterized by reaction, especially opposition to progress or liberalism; extremely conservative.)
In their strident, desperate, all-consuming anti-Americanism, they have allied themselves with murdering dictators, religious fanatics, human-rights violators, weapons-proliferators & oppressive patriarchies.
This can mean only one thing...Conservatives are now the Liberating Vanguard of the Glorious People's Revolution!
So Happy New Year, my Conservative Comrades...
and Best Wishes in the Radiant Future!
UPDATE: Thanks to Cold Fury for the link.
And let me add that it never would have occured to HST to say anything like "Saddam's torture chambers have re-opened under American management", or any of the other treasonous bilge that passes for Democrat rhetoric today.
In fact, you couldn't have held a gun to his head and forced him to say it.
But then, he loved his country.
[ Broadcast from the White House at 10:30 p.m. ]
"My fellow Americans:
I want to talk to you plainly tonight about what we are doing in Iraq and about our policy in the Middle East.
In the simplest terms, what we are doing in Iraq is this: We are trying to prevent a third world war.
I think most people in this country recognized that fact last year. And they warmly supported the decision of the Government to help the nation of Iraq against the Ba'athist dictator. Now, many persons, even some who applauded our decision to liberate Iraq, have forgotten the basic reason for our action.
It is right for us to be in Iraq now. It was right last year. It is right today.
I want to remind you why this is true.
The terrorists in the region are engaged in a monstrous conspiracy to stamp out freedom all over the world. If they were to succeed, the United States would be numbered among their principal victims. It must be clear to everyone that the United States cannot--and will not--sit idly by and await another attack. The only question is: What is the best time to meet the threat and how is the best way to meet it?
The best time to meet the threat is in the beginning. It is easier to put out a fire in the beginning when it is small than after it has become a roaring blaze. And the best way to meet the threat of aggression is for the peace-loving nations to act together. If they don't act together, they are likely to be picked off, one by one.
If we had followed the right policies in the 1990's--if the free countries had acted together to crush the aggression of the terrorists, and if we had acted in the beginning when the aggression was small--there probably would have been no Sept.11.
If history has taught us anything, it is that aggression anywhere in the world is a threat to the peace everywhere in the world. When that aggression is supported by the cruel and selfish rulers of powerful nations who are bent on conquest, it becomes a clear and present danger to the security and independence of every free nation.
The American people are unified in their belief in democratic freedom. We are united in detesting terrorist slavery.
We know that the cost of freedom is high. But we are determined to preserve our freedom--no matter what the cost.
I know that our people are willing to do their part to support our soldiers and sailors and airmen who are fighting in Iraq. I know that our fighting men can count on each and every one of you.
Our country stands before the world as an example of how free men, under God, can build a community of neighbors, working together for the good of all.
That is the goal we seek not only for ourselves, but for all people. We believe that freedom and peace are essential if men are to live as our Creator intended us to live. It is this faith that has guided us in the past, and it is this faith that will fortify us in the stern days ahead."
...Wait a minute; did I say that was George W. Bush speaking on Iraq & the terrorists?
Oops, my bad; that was Harry S. Truman speaking on Korea & the Communists, here and here.
Sadly, today's Liberals wouldn't know the Truman Doctrine from Truman Capote.
And the so-called "Progressive" Left has become their once-favorite epithet:
...Reactionary!
(re·ac·tion·ar·y, adj.: Characterized by reaction, especially opposition to progress or liberalism; extremely conservative.)
In their strident, desperate, all-consuming anti-Americanism, they have allied themselves with murdering dictators, religious fanatics, human-rights violators, weapons-proliferators & oppressive patriarchies.
This can mean only one thing...Conservatives are now the Liberating Vanguard of the Glorious People's Revolution!
So Happy New Year, my Conservative Comrades...
and Best Wishes in the Radiant Future!
UPDATE: Thanks to Cold Fury for the link.
And let me add that it never would have occured to HST to say anything like "Saddam's torture chambers have re-opened under American management", or any of the other treasonous bilge that passes for Democrat rhetoric today.
In fact, you couldn't have held a gun to his head and forced him to say it.
But then, he loved his country.
